The best fertility prescription
Not all prescriptions for having a baby are tedious or painful! The simplest and most effective advise is to have more sex.
Most infertility specialist's prescriptions leave a lot to be desired. Either the medicines are expensive, the injections painful or the side effects bothersome. However, there is one prescription in reproductive medicine which is fun; free and can boost your chances of conceiving considerably - and that is - Sex ! Few patients have received a prescription which just says " Sex " on it, but there is no doubt that having frequent sex is the simplest way of increasing your chances of conceiving.
While it is true that just frequent sex is not going to help some couples to conceive (for example, couples where the wife's tubes are blocked or where the husband's sperm count is zero ), it is also equally true that there are few couples who have "absolute sterility". Many have multiple minor problems, the cumulative effect of which is infertility. Let's take a couple with a common problem, such as a borderline low sperm count, or irregular cycles, for example. It is possible that there a few functional sperm in the semen sample; or that she occasionally does ovulate. However, if they have sex infrequently, their chances of getting pregnant are dismal, because the chances of the eggs and sperm meeting are reduced even further.
Similarly, many studies have shown that the chances of conceiving are maximal 6-12 months after fertility enhancing surgery , such as surgery for correcting endometriosis ; removal of adhesions ( adhesiolysis); or tubal repair surgery ( tuboplasty). Couples who have sex frequently after this type of surgery have a better chance of conceiving, because they are maximizing the probability of the eggs and sperm meeting.
In fact, even after treatments such as intrauterine insemination (IUI ) and in vitro fertilization (IVF), sex has been shown to increase pregnancy rates. The reasons include the fact that more sperm are being deposited; and that chemicals called prostglandins in the semen may increase uterine receptivity to the embryo.
Having sex not only boosts your fertility, it also has a number of pleasant side effects as well ! Both lovemaking and orgasm have been shown to boost blood circulation, improve skin tone, release tension , relieve arthritic pains and promote psychological health. While the mechanisms for these benefits are still unclear, some are simply because of the fact that active sex can involve a lot of muscular activity, depending upon your agility and ability in bed ! Another reason could be the release of chemicals called endorphins (the body's natural painkillers) from the brain and increased levels of cortisol ( the stress hormone) during orgasm.
Sex boosts your fitness quotient too. About 30 minutes of active sex burns 45 calories and provides the equivalent of a good workout, which means sexercising is a great way of keeping in shape ! The additional bonus is that your partner too reaps the benefits, making sex a two-for-the-price-of-one activity.
In a book called Sexual Healing, Dr. Paul Pearsall, Director of Behavioral Medicine at Detroit's Beaumont Hospital, writes that the joys and pleasures of sex may provide us with an "intimacy inoculation" that actually protects us from disease. The science of psychoneuroimmunology ( mind-body medicine) shows that when we experience mutually caring sexual intimacy, hormones such as neuropeptides and cortisol pour through our body , and help promote health and healing.
So how do you keep the sexual energy alive ? The key for achieving this is caring: thinking about it and working at it. Don't have sex just to have a baby - have sex to have fun - the baby can be a pleasant side-effect ! Passionate, exciting love may "hit" out of the blue, but it remains and repeats itself only if it is continually nurtured and treated as an honoured guest. Remember that the most important sexual organ is not the penis or the clitoris-it's the brain. It is best to consider sexuality as an integral part of life - a gift to be honoured and enjoyed. The more you learn about this energy, the more of it you will have and the more you practise it, the better you will get at it. Today, many couples living in cities complain that they are too "tired" to have sex. It is also true that sex is often the first casualty of the ever-increasing stress that we all experience in our fast-paced lifestyles. But what is not known is that good sex is a great stress buster. It can not only help you to cope better with stress, it also increases the body's energy flows. If you find you are too tired to have sex at night, a simple solution is to have sex first thing in the morning and what helps here is that most men have an "early morning" erection anyway.
The good news here is that you can learn to improve your sexual energy. The logic behind this is simple -- the secrets of tapping sexual energy have been an integral part of all ancient cultures, including Chinese (Taoist medicine) and Indian. Tantric sex allows one to unlock the powers of meditation, breathing and massage to help celebrate and revitalise a person's love life. The basic belief here is that the body has a number of chakras -- or energy centres -- and Tantra teaches a person certain exercises, which help in sharing this energy and opening the door to ecstasy. And though earlier this knowledge was locked up in esoteric texts, it is now easily accessible on many websites like www.tantra.com.
The Kamasutra is an integral part of our heritage and from this treatise of love we can learn to understand the physiology of yogic ejaculation control, develop the ability to expand the experience of pleasure and also experience the power of ritual for enhancing lovemaking.
You can learn more about the effect of infertility on sexuality in the Chapter, Sexuality and Infertility.
How to make sex fun
The best way to learn is by watching teenagers - or remembering your own adolescent days, when you only had sex on your mind !
Think of new ways of seducing your wife - ask her for suggestions !
Spend some time and energy in planning sex - anticipation can heighten desire !
Set a 'date' for sex. Modern lifestyles often mean sex gets last priority. So hatch a plot with your partner - book into a hotel for a 'night of sin', away from deadlines and commitments.
Watch erotic films together - this can help you trigger off your own adventures
Experiment with sexual toys such as vibrators , body oils, and edible panties ( many of which you can buy online !)
Try sex in the shower ! Not only do you feel clean, wet and smooth in the bath, water and soap can add magic to your explorations
Try out "kinky" sex. Erotic sex experiments are two-person operations and "getting ready" leads to anticipation and excitement , so that you can break through the barriers and allow you to perform beyond your usual sexual limits.
Liquid paraffin is a safe lubricant to use during "baby making" sex.
You can find more suggestions at websites such as www.sexuality.org
