Most patients are mature enough to understand that IVF cycles will and do fail in spite of the fact that the doctor has done their best .
The problem is many doctors add insult to injury when the IVF cycle fails , and blame the patient for the failure .
They trot out specious reasons, such as You didnt rest enough; You were too stressed out; You ate too much hot food !
All of these are completely false . Once the embryo has been transferred into your uterus, it is complete safe, like a pearl in an oyster.Nothing you do can harm them , so please do not worry about this. And the embryo doesnt care whether it spend 5 days in the fallopian tube, or 5 days in the test tube ! Please do not let your doctor lie to you.
The problem is that when doctors offer these silly reasons for the failure, the patient loses confidence in the doctor . Even worse , some doctors advice expensive tests ( such as ERA( endometrial receptivity assay) , PGS ( preimplantation genetic testing) and immune testing to diagnose the reason for the IVF failure !
This makes no sense to me. Why would the doctor wait for an IVF cycle to fail before advising these tests, if they were really useful ? After all, its in the doctors best interests that his patients get pregnant !
The good news is that patients are now getting smart enough to understand that when a doctor changes his tune after the failure, this often means that they are covering up the truth, and not being open and transparent with them .
The problem is that once they have had a bad experience with one IVF doctor, they don't trust any other IVF doctorseither !