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When my husband and I got married, we had great hopes for children in our future. After several years of marriage and stability in our work, we decided to start trying for a baby. I had a history of endometriosis but was never led to believe by any physician that I would have trouble conceiving. After two years of trying and even a few months with Clomid, we went to a fertility specialist. Thus began eighteen months of tests and heartbreak. We went through one IUI, which failed. I had blood tests which showed I had premature ovarian failure. We had to postpone IVF for two months because of a cyst on my ovary. The IVF process was filled with so much hope and prayer that its failure was unbearable. My physician then told me that he thought donor egg IVF would be my only option. For any couple who has longed for a child the way we did, it was the most heartbreaking news we could have gotten.
We knew that we wanted children - how we got them did not matter so much. The odds were very low that I would find a donor from my own race (Indian) in the United States. Besides, we could not take that much time off of work and we didn't have the financial means to go through a search for someone in the U.S. I started browsing the Internet looking for Indian egg donors and found Dr. Malpani's website. Honestly, I did not expect an answer when I wrote him my story via e-mail. To my astonishment, he wrote back immediately! Thus began a correspondence that eventually led us to Mumbai three months after my failed IVF. I am a person who tends to see the obstacles in everything and I was not sure about going half way around the world to try donor egg IVF. My husband and I were both scared. My physicians here could not believe that Dr. Malpani could make the process so quick and simple. They were very doubtful that things would be successful.
All that I can say is that things went smoothly. There was no red tape or forms to sign relinquishing liability or tests to go through. Things were coordinated carefully even before we got there. We implanted four beautiful embryos. I did not let myself even hope that this could work because I knew I would not be able to handle the letdown. About two weeks after returning to the United States, I had severe abdominal pain and went to my local hospital.
That night, I found out I was pregnant! My pregnancy was not easy. I had placenta previa, gestational diabetes, and pre-eclampsia, ending with delivery at 33 and 1/2 weeks. But our daughter, besides being small, was healthy and perfect. She is the joy of our lives. She has a smile for us whenever she sees us. She is the most beautiful thing we have ever seen. We would never have known this kind of happiness without Dr. Malpani. We dared to take a leap of faith on a doctor we had not even met. I cannot begin to express how grateful we are for Dr. Malpani and his staff. Everyone was so kind and patient through my myriad of phone calls and e-mails.
The lesson that we learned through this five-year experience is to never give up hope. God grants you ways of finding what you are looking for - they just may not be the conventional ways. I want to give a special thanks to the egg donors at the Malpani clinic. Without them, our dreams would never have been realized. It takes special people to give of themselves in this way and special physicians and staff to make things work. We will never to able to thank the Malpani clinic enough for everything they have done for us.
You can email me at [email protected] if you'd like to talk to me about our journey in having a child.
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